Thursday, August 30

Oh heck no....

I was reading my daily news on the net(because unlike normal people, we do not have cable or get the daily paper) and I came across this.
You will never see me around a place like that!
"At first, it was so white it looked like fairyland," said Donna Garde, superintendent of the park about 45 miles east of Dallas.

Yeah. Right.

Herbert A. "Joe" Pase, a Texas Forest Service entomologist, said the massive web is very unusual.
"From what I'm hearing it could be a once-in-a-lifetime event," he said.


Hummm, still so not for me. Ever.

I have to admit something though, and it kinda gives me the heebie-geebies when I think about it(kinda freaked out right now, and thinking those nasty things are crawling all over me). I used to catch spiders all the time and put them in to jars when I was younger! I would get like twenty in a jar, like it was nothing. And in my grandmas barn, there was this one area that was not used anymore and tons of spiders made their homes there, my brother and I called it "Spider City"(I know sooo original, but come on, we were just kids then)and we would catch them too.


Oh. But now. If I see a spider, I freak out, and I look like I'm having a body spasm. Oh and I freak out when I walk through a spider web......hate, HATE that.

So I either yell for my husband to come and kill it.....all the while he's making fun of me and calling me a wuss. Then he chases me with the squashed spider around the house, laughing and thinking it's just the best amusement ever. Jerk.
Or, I (when he's not home) freak out, and get the kids away from the area if they are around. Then I pace back and forth talking to my self, thinking about calling my little brother to come over and kill it for me.....but that won't do no good, this spider will eat me before he gets here. So I throw a hand towel over it and stomp the heck out of it! Seriously. And I have to have shoes on when I do it, because if it runs out and touches me, Oh. Heck. No.

We have friends that don't kill the spiders that come in to their house, because "it's lost and looking for a place to build it's home" (no, I'm not kidding) so the take it outside in their yard and let it go.

Me. If a spider comes in to my home, it's going to be killed. We don't kill spiders that are outside(would rather have them far, far, far away from my home) but the second they step in our house, it's only a matter of time before it gets squashed. Or sprayed. Or vacuumed up. Or burnt.(my husband likes to do that)

So(in my best pirate voice ever) spider's ye be warned, turn back or it's the plank for you! Arrrrr!





Ciao.

5 people had something to say:

Anonymous said...

I came *this* close to clicking on the link. Then? My eyes saw the word "web" and I knew what it was.

Hell to the know on THAT. I'm already sitting here all skeeved out and I didn't even see the damn thing.

I kill spiders inside. I don't kill them with my own shoe as I would then have to throw it away and buy new ones and the man of the house would get all bent out of shape and sigh. Not worth the trouble.

:)

Anonymous said...

Honey, you can always call me to come kill your spiders, I have to kill them for your dad and most of the male police officers I have worked with. spiders don't bother me now snakes...ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

so I won't laugh at you either or chase you with the spider. Love you Mom

Mommyca said...

Kellie- teehee, I should start using my husbands shoes, or if I have to use mine, I will tell him that I NEED to buy a new pair:o)because the evil little thing has spoiled my shoe:o)

Mom-thank you! You'll have to almost live here, our grage seems to be some breading ground for all sorts of eight legged yuckyness! and they like to chase me when I try to do the laundry, I kid you not:o)

Unknown said...

I tell you anyone who goes out to that field is nuts. No thank you! I HATE spiders. One day I was getting in my car and as I was shutting the door, I saw big nasty spider staring up at me from my leg. I jumped so badly, that I ended up crunching my head into the car ceiling and falling out onto my driveway on my knees. This was followed immediately by getting up and doing the "swat myself so hard that I will kill brain cells dance" until I was convinced the spider had run away. My neighbor thought I was having an epileptic fit. Hate those hairy turds. (not the neighbors, the spiders!!!)

M said...

Oh homie I am SO glad I didn't click that because I've SO seen it on tv (stupid evil tv) and I have serious spider issues.

I'm a killer too. My mother cried hysterically when she was here once because I killed a zillion baby spiders on my deck. HELLO! ZILLION. BABY. SPIDERS. They grow up you know and they were all headed for my door (that my mom kept leaving open!)